Woman Goes to Gym Eight Straight Days Before Admitting Defeat

Written by Lexi Harder, Staff Writer

Monday, January 9th, 2012 marks a historic day in the history of resolution keeping, when a Philadelphia woman (who wishes to remain anonymous until her press agent clears her for public notice) apparently kept a New Years’ resolution eight days.

This woman, who resolved to go to the gym daily, managed to fulfill her promise from January 1st until January 8th of this year.

“I decided to really go big for 2012,” she said. “I usually only keep my new years’ resolutions for five days, and last year I realized that giving up cake was hopeless so I was back to sweets by January 2nd. But I felt that this year was my year, you know? And I was right.”

This new year seems to display an overall trend showing that people have gotten more serious about keeping their December 31st promises.

One Tennessee resident even posted his goals on his household refrigerator, although he states that he has no intentions of following through with them.

Several of those interviewed say that their Smartphones are excellent at reminding them of what they said they would do.

“I love how when I put my goals into my phone, I can easily turn the sound off when my phone tries to tell me to go for a run,” said one giddy mother of three. “It’s really revolutionized how I see myself—a lot more guilt is gone, and a lot earlier in the year too.”

Usually, resolutions are discarded from the conscience for good around Valentine’s day, that glorification of the lonely during the allegedly most depressing month of the year. But people have started taking a more aggressive stance towards their goals, and many are saying that they don’t really need to let a discarded goal haunt them into February any more.

“I did really well this year,” says our the woman from Philadelphia. “And I think it’s time I let myself relax a little. As soon as eight days were up, I realized it was unrealistic to keep running everyday, or even every week. I’m at peace with myself now.”

Will this woman’s feat provide inspiration to a whole score of people who feel as if they can keep a resolution too? It remains to be seen, but for now you can rest easy in the knowledge that you don’t need to worry about making resolutions again until 2013.